A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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A blind man walks past a fish market, pauses, takes in a big sniff, and says, "Good morning ladies!" to the women walking by wearing too much perfume.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It would be unlikely for any entity of this time to speak English and communicate with chickens so it is improbable for one to know the answer.

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

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Q: What did Yoda do at the end of star wars when he lost his light saber? A: He asked the prop guy if he had any more and he happened to have another and they went on with making the great film many still love today.

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I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

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Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

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Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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tom pauling

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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I Have a Black Friend

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A giant foot comes over the town and a man says "theres something big afoot" hahahahahahaha

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

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Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops