September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +156

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What did the toaster say to the bread? Nothing. Toasters can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -105

Why did the group of black men not get paid for all of their manual labor? It was the early 1800's.

thumb_up thumb_down +146

So a bear walks into a bar. Everyone in there goes hysterical with the fright. Two people are killed by it.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did Hitler like his steak well done? Because like many people, he didn't like the sight of blood in his steaks.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

thumb_up thumb_down -116

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Getting aids from that apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Chuck Norris watches TV.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red, I want a gravestone, nobody loves me, forever alone

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +7

the WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -17

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

thumb_up thumb_down +126

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Crunchie

thumb_up thumb_down +112

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops