what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? ...

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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