My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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knock knock who's there ?

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops