A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

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Cripples are lame.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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Seriosly. too much sex again?

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A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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