Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Why did the plane crash? There was a horrible mechanical error that caused the main engines to fail.

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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i like pie.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susy.

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I'm so hot my father calls me son.

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops