What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Mrs. Welsh

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? I agree to the terms of service.

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Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

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Why do animals on the side of the road stink? Well they don't, you just think they do when in reality all it is, is there insides rottening From prevous days of exposen of the air now as far as I know all the little baby squrriel Wanted was it get his nuts in the road and it bring back to his starving family counting on him to bring Food to the tree next thing you know a soccer mom's van ran the poor baby squirrel over. Now me knowing this squirrel myself (don't ask me how) he wanted to go out in style you know get ran over by a mustang or a lambo not some bitch ass mini van with sliding doors and a dvd player convinit for the kids to watch spongebob.... man I bet that squrriel was pissed!

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what did the ginger say to the other ginger? I dont now i dont speak GINGER!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz 7 8 9

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i saw your mom, i said hi

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z which one does not belong answer: none

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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I was born.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

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the WNBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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