What's my name? I don't know i was asking u.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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do you want to hear a joke 123456789 987654321 boo!

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I lost my tractor.

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What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

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a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Matt is not funny.

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whats 2+2? 4

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What did the dog say to the human. "Woof."

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how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

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Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

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what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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