Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

thumb_up thumb_down +42

what colour is a frog green you idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What isn't funny? The holacost.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

terry stockton is straight

thumb_up thumb_down +36

I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +32

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops