A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No.

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

Hey

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Goofy sold Pluto into slavery in exchange for the power of human speech.

Where do black jews go? The back of the oven

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Your mother

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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