What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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nice shorts.

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Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

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h

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

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Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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