How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

Hello I'm a fat kid

Jesus Christ walks into a Hotel.. he hands the Inn keeper 3 nails and says " Hey..can you put me UP for the night?"

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

What do you find....... there's a..........

A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's your name? You tell me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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