What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

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GONNA

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Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

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What should I name my dog?

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where's waldo? in a picture book.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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knock knock you may come in

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yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

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A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

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What's 9 +10 19

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A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

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Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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