Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

I'm funny.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

What did the black man say to the white man? Nothing. He punched him in the face and stole his iPhone.

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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