Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why are trees green? I have no idea

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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