whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer.

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what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

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y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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The Holocaust

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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