How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

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What do you calk a couple of friends hanging out? An intimate get-together.

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What did Pikachu say to Charmander? Nothing. Pokemon are fictional creatures, and thus, do not exist.

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Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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What did the depressed girl say to her mother? I cut my wrists

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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A black man got sentenced go prison for stealing a car. He didn't do it.

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A man goes into a bar and gets drunk. He realizes that he is too drunk to drive and calls a cab to bring him home.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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dyslexia is like gingervitus except they are exactly alike in possible little ways with gigantic raging boners CC

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

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Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

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What happens when you mix bath salts, marijiuana, and crack cocaine and proceed to inject it into your body in some manner? You have one of the biggest trips of your life in which it will ware off and you will proceed with your life

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say sopha king together then sat funny at the end

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this website even though its hilarious.

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Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops