what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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a man and a boy walk into a dark scary wood. "gosh I'm spooked" exclaimed the boy. "you think you've got it bad?" said the man "I'm walking out of here alone"

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

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Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

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Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

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Knock knock Whose there? 4

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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