A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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Why did the black kid pass the exam? Because he studied.

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women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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what do you order when it's a sunday in nyc during a solar eclipse on a leap year past 12:00 pm? what ever you like

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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Q: What's the difference between a child dressing as a ghost for Halloween and a real ghost? A: About a tablespoon of arsenic.

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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