How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

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Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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where did little suzie go during 9/11 EVERYWHERE...

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Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

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Hi

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Whats Bin Laden's favorite store 9/11

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Yo momma's so fat, she's most likely to be at risk of high cholesterol and should probably get herself tested at her nearest health clinic.

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Q; What feels like plastic and tastes fake? A: School Food

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Three tomatoes were walking down the street, a daddy, a mummy and a baby and...wait did I say tomatoes, sorry, I meant people.

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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I'm Coming

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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My friend who's a chef was stabbed by his own kitchen knife, everyone said it would be in bad taste to joke about it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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