170

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +159

If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +139

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

thumb_up thumb_down -49

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -137

what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops