Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

my hand is a DOLPHIN!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guys ducked.

What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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