What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

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Hey "Oren" its Red, sorry but I got to go now. How you been doing? Kinda missed you over here. So you actually care about how you sound now?

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why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

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ORGANISM. Yeah, I thought it said "orgasm" too.

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What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

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2 + 2 = fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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