So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

I'm tired of your blind jokes, I just don't see the humor in them........

Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

Surprise mother father (A+)

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

69

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

Apple.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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