So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

What do u call a black polar bear? A black bear

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

i hate anti-jokes ;)

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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