Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

knock knock piss off

What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

Let's see how many dislikes this can get!

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Two men walk into a bar, they weren't looking where they were going.

There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

Your mom is fat

Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

Chinese food tastes so oriental sometimes, sort of like asian food

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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