What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

Well, you see, I'm an extractor fan.

Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

Mahmy

If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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