how did the man jump over the mountain? it was a small mountain and he had a trampoline

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70% of heroin addicts die at some point in their life.

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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Neil Lewis

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Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

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An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

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how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

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2 + 2 = fish

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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you gay?

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

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Q- How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A- You Poke Her Face

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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