How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Want to hear a joke? So do I.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

you will like this because i am black.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Haiku's are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops