How do you make your friends more positive ? Infect them with HIV.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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What does an Ethiopian hula-hoop with? A Cheerios JimBoto

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Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

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Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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Why did the little boy fall of his bike? He was dead.

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Why did Sally get hit with a fridge? Because someone threw a fridge at Sally Why would someone throw a fridge at her? Because Sally has no arms

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This is a random Anti joke.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops