How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

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What did the nerd say to his friend regarding the test they had just taken? - Nothing, he doesn't have any friends.

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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why did the ginger get made fun of? because he had red hair

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

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what does the sloth say to dylan sedgwick nothing dylan is the sloth

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What's worse than eating brussel sprouts? Getting raped by a brussel sprout.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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