A dolphin walks into a bar. Dolphins do not have legs therefore this is physically impossible.

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What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

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What's worse than not finding your true love in high school? Dying

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- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

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How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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What walks on it's hands My uncle

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Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? ..He died.

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Pokemon go: Team mystic

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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What's faster than a black man running with your tv His brother with your XBOX

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops