Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

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How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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Why did the whale cross the ocean? To reproduce as a way of life.

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Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

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A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

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How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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WHY DID THE WHITE MAN TALK TO THE BLACK MAN TO LIGHTEN HIM UP

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Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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What is the mexican dream? To jump the border

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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