What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

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What happens when a PC gamer without a mic rages? ASDKFHQIUEWHASKZNF9324Y8PTWFSDIUHASDFADSFUFKASJDF843QADKJVNCXT%$W(ESDHDSFAAASDFASKLDFU8EWADSdsfalsdkjfhuewanzxcAJSKDFUIEW

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Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

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Q:What's worse then Finding A Worm in Your apple? A: Realizing how empty your life is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The answer really isn't that important.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

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Ju... Just why?

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Ron Paul for President!

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9/11, Amanda Todd, Adalia Rose, Cancer, Swag, Yolo, Disco, anything Southern, Nazi's, and Police officers walk into a bar Everyone stares because these are mildly offensive things.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You throw it out the window.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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