Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

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Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

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A family of aristocrats walks into a talent agency and shows their performance. The talent agent asks: "How do you call yourselves?" They say: "The Aristocrats", "because that's what we are; Aristocrats."

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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Q. why was Martin Luther King assassinated? A. he wasn't his son was

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So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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So a black man hails a taxi...

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the cast of the jersey shore

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

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Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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Cows go moo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to....

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops