A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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justin bieber

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having sexaual relations with your own mother.

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A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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What is cold? Winter

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Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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47

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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