Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

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What did the woman buy her husband? Nothing, she's a widow.

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

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What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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Not much of an anti joke but here we go... - What do you get when you cross a jew and a potato? - A Baked potato!

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Homework.

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The holocaust.

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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