Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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why did the man die? he got shot

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A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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Q: why do the Toronto maple leafs suck? A: they dont they r in seventh place biotch!

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

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What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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What does a man like. food.

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Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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