How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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Why did Suzie die? She ate too many fried twinkies.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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96

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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