Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

An iguana walks out of a bar

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

What what In the butt

Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

women's rights

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

Want to hear an anti-joke?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...