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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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