A man makes a sandwich.

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Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

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Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

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How old are you? 20

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my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

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How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

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What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

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A brunette is walking up the side of a river. She sees a blonde on the other side. "How did you get to the other side?" asked the brunette. "I used the bridge just a few more kilometers up" the blonde replies.

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Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

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Why do rabbits have such a reputation for rampant reproduction? Sex feels extra good for rabbits.

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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A mans opinion.

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What did the Jew say the Black man after their meal? "Don't worry, I'll pay the bill."

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

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an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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