Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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what did the wall say to the floor? nothing interior structure supports do not talk

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she no arms

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Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

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Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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What did the feminist say to the CIS white male? I respect you as a person.

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There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

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When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

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Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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