Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

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what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? You find someone you trust and say "an elephant has been in my refrigerator".

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Why are AntiJokes so funny? Because your brain analyses them and makes you laugh.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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Have you seen the Hobbit? Yes they're taking him to Isengard

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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A black man walks into a store and buys something.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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A dyslexic Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. He hits his head on it and is rushed to the hospital,only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

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You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops