How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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your mother is so obese, that she really should look into eating a well balanced diet and taking part in an excercise plan that suits her

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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The Princess is in another castle

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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