A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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My friend harris is fat.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

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Why did the man go to sleep at 9:30? Because his mom told him to

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

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Directions- I would be lost without you. Thank you for always being there for me.

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 was convicted of a murder, but was released due to lack of evidence, and 6 is very concerned for the protection of himself and his growing family.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs sitting on your street corner? Suicidal.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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captcha: all yer base

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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