Why do we bother living when someday we will die? To reproduce and watch TV.

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As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

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Q: What is a man? A: A miserable little pile of secrets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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a man walks into a prostitute.

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Mullets

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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knock knock get lost!

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Bean.

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do you currently smoke? i hope not.

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What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

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What is black and is good at stealing stuff? a ninja.

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What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

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The queen is killed on sunday there are three suspects the cheif the princess and the butler The princess' said she was getting lunch The cheif said he was making lunch The butler said je was getting the mail So who did it A: the butler they dont diliever mail on sunday

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops