How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

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What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

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a ginger has a soul

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The weels on the bus go...flat

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how do you confuse a blond?

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

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How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

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If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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Oh no! My life is ruined!

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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I'm a brony. I'm a brony. I'm a brony. Screw this shit, I'm not a brony anymore. I'm a man. I'm a man. Screw this too. I'm dead, not in bed.

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I lost my tractor.

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Where did Sally go during the explosion? Everywhere.

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops