A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

what is worse then going to school farlingaye

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

what do you say to a black man with a Porsche? "hey man, i like your car."

What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

Your mama's so fat she can't have children.

Two boys were walking down a building which was under construction. Suddenly a brick hits the 1 one in the head while the 2 guys aunt was in America.

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

Q: What is, in full, Donald Trump's speech to the Republican National Convention? A: This. I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! Trump tromp troomp trimp treemp tramp trump trump trump!

Why did the man fall from the sky? Because he was dead.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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