knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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