i committed murder

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -35

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down -35

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

thumb_up thumb_down -37

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

thumb_up thumb_down -37

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Just because you do not see the joke, it does`t mean its not here... Ps: It helps us get hookers and beers while wasting your "valuable time" OMG PLEASE BE FUCKING UNDERSTANDING OHMYLAWD!!!!!!!!! Ps: Cry harder you greedy sons of shedogs

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's newborn baby? Neither has she.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops