Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

- Helen Keller

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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